Al-Anon Ideas
Detachment
Alcoholism is a family disease. Living with the effects of someone else's drinking is too devastating for most people to bear without help. In Al-Anon, we learn that we are not responsible for another person's disease or recovery.
We let go of our obsession with another's behavior and begin to lead happier and more manageable lives. Lives with dignity and rights, lives guided by a Power greater than ourselves.
In Al-Anon we learn:
- Not to suffer because of the actions or reactions of other people
- Not to allow ourselves to be used or abused by others in the interest of another's recovery
- Not to do for others what they could do for themselves
- Not to manipulate situations so others will eat, go to bed, get up, pay bills, not drink
- Not to cover up for anyone's mistakes or misdeeds
- Not to create a crisis
- Not to prevent a crisis if it is in the natural course of events
Detachment is neither kind nor unkind. It does not imply judgment or condemnation of the person or situation from which we are detaching. It is simply a means of allowing ourselves to separate from the adverse effects of another person's alcoholism. It helps families look at their situations realistically and objectively, thereby making intelligent decisions possible.
Anonymity
"What you say here, what you hear here, let it stay here." Al-anon is an anonymous fellowship. Everything that is said here in the group meeting and member to member must be held in confidence. Only in this way can we feel free to say what is in our minds and hearts, for this is how we help one another in Al-Anon.
Sponsorship
Our group strongly encourages sponsorship. A sponsor is a fellow al-anon member with whom you can discuss personal issues. He or she can act as an additional guide to the experience, strength, and hope of the Al-Anon program. The relationship between you and your sponsor is a close, personal, and mutually-supportive one, and is another way in which the program can help you find serenity.
Why There's Hope
The family situation is bound to improve as we apply Al-Anon ideas. Without such spiritual help, living with an alcoholic is too much for most of us. Our thinking becomes distorted by trying to force solutions, and we become irritable and unreasonable without knowing it.
The Al-Anon program is based on the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, which we try, little by little, one day at a time, to apply to our lives along with our slogans and the Serenity Prayer. The loving interchange of help among members and daily reading of Al-Anon literature make us ready to receive the priceless gift of serenity.